Incorporating New Parenting Skills

Sibling Rivalry: Dethronement

Story: Kitchen Assistant

When my son Jacob was feeling left out because he had a new baby brother, I made him into the kitchen assistant. Here he was, two-and-a-half-years-old, and he’s tearing up lettuce leaves and helping make a salad. The phone might ring he’d hear me say, “I can’t talk right now, I’m busy making dinner with Jacob and I’ll call you back.” This gave Jake a sense of power as an older brother helping out in the family. In a few years, Jacob became a big help with meal preparation and, eventually he became a chef at a five-star restaurant. All from being dethroned at an early age!

Teaching Point

Kids love to be helpful if given the chance at a young age. Give children age appropriate opportunities to help parents around the house. At early ages, children want to help with the dusting, the cooking, the table setting, and the cleaning. This is the easiest and best time to teach children these skills, It is helpful to the whole family and will be helpful to them when they move out and begin life on their own.

At first, it will take a little bit longer to show them how to dry the pan, how to fold the hand towel, how to put the napkins around the table, or how to dust the coffee table, but the dividends are well worth the investment.

Take a Pause

Story: Fireman Clothes

I used to get really mad at my son because every night he was supposed to take his clothes and put them out for school the next day, He would always make a big wad of his clothes in the middle of his room. I was getting rather frustrated with him. One time I took the time to ask in a calm tone, “Why do you always bundle your clothes in the middle of the room? They get all wrinkled for the next morning for school.” My son said, “Well that’s how the firemen do it.” He had been to a firehouse and had seen how they don’t have to go looking for everything. It made me understand so much more what was going on from my child’s point of view.

Teaching Point:

For young kids, getting into their world and asking them what’s important to them is very valuable as a parent too. If you are having trouble about a certain issue, first take a pause, then ask the child with curiosity, not judgement, why they are doing such an action. Incorporate these new parenting skills and you will reap the rewards of parenthood.